This blog post is a continuation to my previous post where I share my top 3 tips for quick post-partum recovery
To mention again my post-partum with Emilia (my first child) was everything but smooth and quick.
Maybe for many of you mummies my tips are nothing mind blowing as this all came to you very naturally… but for me I had to learn hard way. So if you are anything like me – ambitious control freak who has trouble to slow down and relax – you may appreciate this post:)
IV. First few weeks spend all of your free time by getting to know your baby
It is horrible to say but the truth is all I felt about Emilia as a baby was- although very much loved and wanted she was “a bit” inconvenient at that time.
Why don’t you sleep child- I have things to do!!!!
I had no help except of my husband…He is a great daddy but still he leaves to work at 8am and is back at 6pm.
I was studying one year long course at Integrative Institute of Nutrition. The birth (very long and traumatic) was followed by problems with breastfeeding and prolonged postpartum healing etc. So learned from my own mistakes I promised myself that this time I will slow down to maximum. I would not study, I would not work, I would not exercise until I am healed and mostly until my inner voice tells me I am ready to take some incremental steps to add on to my day. Instead I focused on getting to know Sami, learning about his natural rhythm and later enforcing a routine based on my observation.
This is how our day looks now (give or take hour here and there) He is such an angel baby. Maybe he was born like that maybe he just likes our routine???:) who knows…
V. Allow your family to settle well around a new routine
Whether I wanted or not our family routine had to change. And I have to admit I often don’t have a good relationship with a “change”:)
But this time I prepared myself to be open minded and just go with the flow and make necessary changes where required.
Are CRAZY now!!!
Emilia has to wake up at 6 am (used to be 6.30 or 45am) and after that she needs to be fed washed and dressed up. Lunch box prepared. AND in the same time Sami gets up anytime between 6 and 6.30am and guess what? He needs to be changed and fed too!
Adjustment simply means I can’t do my morning meditation or walk or any other exercise. That has to simply wait. Same for my husband. But this time I know this is all just a phase and it will be possible once again to go back to our ideal morning routine.
Are EVEN CRAZIER:)
I used to partially prepare dinner during Mili’s nap time now I have to prepare completely out it to fridge in such a stage that it needs just warming up or uncovering. We used to go outside to have friends over for a play date or we went to beach or pool or park or we biked or walked to the grocery. Adjustment is we have to wait until Sami gets up from his afternoon nap till 4.30pm and gets fed. We are ready to leave the house for a walk at 5 and because of his short “awake span” we are back at about 5.30 or 5.45pm.
CAN’T BE MORE CRAZY:)
So Sami has a witching hour from 6pm.So we learned that we simply can’t have a family dinner all of at 6PM anymore. It is either me or my husband who eats with Mili and the other one massages and baths Sami meanwhile. Then once they are finished Mili gets bathed as well and then she plays a bit before story and bed time (it used to be play time straight after dinner and then bath time) I used to prepare Mili’s lunch box in the morning as she was leavening to nursery 7.30 am now she has to be out of house 7 am. So the lunch box has to be almost ready to pack to her rucksack in the evening. (what we do in the morning I just transfer “the keep cool stuff” to her cool bag and to keep warm stuff I microwave and put the thermoflask.
TIP 4: This is nothing new but I think this is the most important lesson after having Mili.
Don’t plan anything else for your postpartum other than to rest and feed. Yes you read it well…. And let me repeat it again. Nothing else other than taking care of your baby and yourself! Not even an online study program you can follow based on your time availability.
First few weeks just observe. Babies usually have their natural rhythm. At least both of mine had. If you find any repetitive patterns, try to enforce them in the later weeks. If you notice your baby likes to sleep in the morning from around 8- 9am and gets tired at 6pm then start there. The easiest is to build a morning and evening routine. The middle of the day will fall in place gradually.
TIP 5: Give up in advance on all of your morning routines. You might be lucky to fit them back in no time. But give up first to avoid disappointment. Be at peace with it. Everything is just a phase and your mornings will soon have more structure again. If you have a second child who needs to go to nursery get the clothes| uniform ready in the and prepare lunch box in the morning. It is often helpful to even have a breakfast ready like overnight oats or muffins or quinoa pudding.
TIP 6: Keep it simple. Don’t try to do too much. Especially if you have an older child afterschool activities might be just way too much in the early days. Your older child won’t get behind because of few months of having a stroll with you and the new-born. In fact it might be exactly what he need just right now.
TIP 7: If you don’t want to give up on healthy dinners (or want to start with healthy eating) get some food prepared and freeze it for the very early days. Later you just need to prepare the dinner when the baby naps. Get it ready to the stage you literally just take it out of fridge when you get back home from your afternoon walk or when the dinner time comes. Babies gets tired around 5-6pm. It is better to expect that you need to firstly bath your baby and have a dinner later or your husband and younger child have a dinner while you bath your baby.